On Easter Sunday, I posted that I would be taking a break from writing. I shared I would be going on a sabbatical of sorts. That was several months ago. Since then, you have not heard from me. I have been quiet. I appreciate how so many of you have reached out to me during this time to ask about my whereabouts.
Life got a bit out of control for a time. I found myself running from one thing to the next. All the margin in my schedule got pushed out. There was a constant feeling that I was always behind and never able to give anything the time and attention that it deserved.
- not my relationship with God
- not my family
- not my church
- not my writing
- not my health
I was scrambling. I would put out one fire only to have another fire start in a different place. I felt like that cartoon character that sticks his finger in the dam to plug the hole only to have another hole open up. He then plugs that hole with another finger. Then another hole opens up and he plugs it with a toe. Eventually there are so many holes, but no fingers or toes left. Then somehow, magically, another hand appears to plug the additional holes. But for all the heroic effort, it is eventually too much and the dam breaks.
It got to the point that when another crisis appeared I would just laugh. It was not funny, but when you are already overwhelmed, why not? I could not have felt any more stretched. One more thing was not going to make it any worse.
Writing was something I was doing to get it done. I was not enjoying it. Neither did I feel like I was giving the creative process the time it deserved. My devotion and journaling was suffering. I was not taking the time to listen to God. The very thing I needed to do more of in this busy season was the one thing I was doing less. Because I was not hearing from God, I did not have much to share from God.
Neither was I seeing much fruit in any area of my life. We had some family medical issues at home. At our church, I was struggling with some legal and financial challenges. My days were filled with too many doctors, lawyers, and accountants. I felt like everything needed my attention and as a result nothing had my attention. I was jumping from one thing to the next. And it is difficult to find the motivation when you are not seeing fruit.
Something needed to change. Something needed to be different. I didn’t really want to step away from writing, but I knew that I needed to do it. I knew that I needed to step back from as much as was possible and reassess some things. I needed time to spend with God and to hear from God.
So I spent more time in the last few months praying, reading, journalling, and listening. Life has still been busy. But I have found more time to breath. I feel rested and refreshed. Many of the more hectic aspects of things have calmed down. There are always crises to deal with, but by spending more time with God, I have been better able to discern what is urgent and needs my attention and what can wait.
One thing that God has made clear during this time away from writing is that I need to write. There is no doubt about it. This endeavor has bore fruit many times over. If there is anything that I can point to in ministry that God has prospered the most, this is it. The words that I have published in books and online has reached so many more people than anything else I have done.
Writing is one of the things that is not urgent. But it is something that is important in my calling. It is something for me to do not when I find the time, but to make the time. I was trying to fit in in around everything else. But God has shown me that this is something to carve into my schedule and to allow other things – even urgent things – to find their space around my writing.
A couple of other lessons that I have discerned:
Prayer is necessary
I have re-engaged my heart in prayer. There is nothing that has made a difference as much as prayer. God doesn’t promise that we will never experience trials. But what he does promise is that he will bring us through the trials. And one of the most critical ways that he gives us the strength to endure is through prayer.
The people you surround yourself with is important.
Yesterday, Barbara, my wife, and I celebrated our anniversary. I am so blessed by her. There has been no one that has given me more encouragement to write more than Barbara. God has used her to lift me up and bring me back. She saw what I could not see. We all need people to speak into our lives and help us discern our circumstances from a different perspective than we can see.
Be intentional
Know where you are going. Know what is important. Make decisions based on that. Often we allow our circumstances to dictate our decisions more than God’s calling. If you have not decided on your heart what is important you will be pulled and swayed by every little thing.
My Plan
I will be publishing on my blog during the month of July, starting next week. I will be again taking a break during August, as I will be taking an extended family vacation. But I will return to the normal publishing schedule starting in September.
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Betty says
Welcome back
Phil Ressler says
Thanks Betty!
Diane Felicio says
I appreciate your honest telling of what the last few months were like for you. I expect many of your readers can relate to your sense of being overwhelmed and, as a result, under-nourished in prayer, quiet, relationships, sleep, etc… I hope as you begin to refill your time, that you do so in ways that are fulfilling AND practical (e.g., writing when you have something to say v. on some pre-determined calendar that you come to dread; making space to do absolutely nothing at all other than taking a few deep breaths; and paying attention to the early signals of stress.). All the best – Diane
Phil Ressler says
Thanks Diane for those words. Yes, indeed! I hear everything you are saying.