I have come across a few people in my ministry that seem to do little more than complain. They are quick to point out how disappointed they are with what you are doing. But the other thing that seems consistent with these people is that they are the ones who seem to do the least. It is almost as if they seem to think that their contribution is their complaint.
It was difficult to deal with this at first. I would become upset and frustrated. But I have learned to take it in stride. I now listen to the complaints but receive the complaints with a grain of salt recognizing where they come from. But not everyone has learned this patience. I am in a profession where receiving complaints is common and patience is necessary. But not everyone is as accustomed to dealing with it.
Complaining does not help you get your way with most people. The more you complain, the less inclined others are motivated to help you out. You will win more people with honey than you will with vinegar.
Instead of complaining, consider how you can help to make the situation better. The reason things may not be ideal in a church setting is there might not be enough people helping out and the burden has fallen on a few overworked volunteers. Become part of the solution rather than part of the problem.
If you have a legitimate complaint, be kind. The person receiving the complaint is not always the responsible party. It is unfair for them to be confronted with a hot-tempered person. They may be trying to do their best in a difficult situation.
Also, talk to the right people. People tend to complain about a situation with other people who can’t do anything about the situation. There is a name for this. It is called gossip. If you have a problem, talk with the person who can do something about it. Otherwise, it is best to keep your mouth shut.
Offer praise and compliments. We all appreciate a little bit of encouragement. There is a saying that people don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care. Offering encouragement is a way to show how much you care. If you are a complimentary person, when the time comes for you to offer a critique, it will be more readily received because the other person will know it comes from the heart.
Ezria Stello says
You’re putting the most Words right into my/our heart(s)!
A compliment from the heart!
Barbara Elder says
Wise advice…..thank you